Imagine growing up in a household marked by constant financial instability, where food was often scarce, utilities were cut off, and frequent moves were the norm. Or maybe you lived in a home where addiction created chaos, with parents exhibiting erratic behavior, neglect, and even dangerous situations. Perhaps your daily reality included emotional and physical abuse, making every day a challenge of navigating fear and pain. Or maybe you had a parent struggling with untreated mental illness, leading to an unpredictable and unstable environment. In some homes, severe family conflict made you a silent witness to aggression and terror, learning to remain invisible to avoid becoming a target. Neglectful environments left you without basic emotional and physical support, leading to feelings of worthlessness and abandonment.

Imagine being a “kid” living in a home where things were always uncertain. Every other day if not every day felt tense, as if you were always on edge, never knowing when something bad might happen. To manage, you got really good at watching for danger and reading people’s feelings, trying hard to avoid arguments, suppressing your emotions and feelings. At that dear age, you have begun to live in constant fight or flight mode- and unknowingly unaware of the determents related to always “living on the edge. As time passed, these distorted coping mechanisms you thought of as “staying safe” became daily habits and a part of your daily norm, even when you weren’t in danger anymore.

My dear friend, if you found yourself resonating and connecting with this narrative- then I am here to tell you … you have been unconsciously (or consciously) living in “survival mode.”

This is the essence of survival mode — a state of being that many people unknowingly carry into adulthood, deeply affecting their mental health and relationships.

So… What is “Survival Mode” Mindset?

Survival mode is characterized by a chronic state of heightened alertness and readiness for perceived threats, rooted in past trauma, adversity, or chronic stress where immediate safety takes precedence. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, it involves a constant state of anxiety and vigilance, where individuals prioritize immediate survival needs over long-term well-being. This adaptive response to chronic stress or trauma means that the body and mind focus intensely on safety concerns (National Institute of Mental Health, n.d.).

In contrast, generalized anxiety disorder involves pervasive worry across various aspects of life. While both can stem from past trauma or chronic stress, survival mode specifically emphasizes immediate safety and preparedness for perceived threats, such as physical dangers, emotional instability in relationships, financial instability, or other unpredictable situations. This mindset is adaptive in environments where safety was not guaranteed, with individuals adapting to increase their chances of survival in threatening situations.

How Is Survival Mode Mindset Learned?

Survival mode is often learned through experiences of chronic stress, trauma, or adversity, where immediate safety and basic needs become paramount (National Institute of Mental Health, n.d.). Survival mode prioritizes immediate safety over long-term well-being, shaping how individuals navigate relationships, work environments, and personal challenges. Here are some ways survival mode is learned:

• Early Childhood Experiences: Growing up in an environment where safety was not guaranteed, such as in unstable or abusive households.
• Adverse Life Events: Experiencing significant life events such as loss of a loved one, financial hardship, or serious illness, which trigger prolonged stress responses.
• Continuous Stress: Facing ongoing stressors like job insecurity, relationship conflicts, or community violence, which keep the body and mind in a constant state of alertness.
• Cultural and Social Factors: Living in communities where survival strategies are necessary for physical or emotional protection due to discrimination, poverty, or social unrest.
• Personal Coping Mechanisms: Developing coping mechanisms like hypervigilance or emotional detachment to navigate environments perceived as threatening.
• Reinforcement of Behavior: Receiving positive reinforcement for survival behaviors, such as being praised for being hyper-prepared or anticipating problems before they arise.

Common Mental Health Diagnoses Undying Survival Mode Mindset

As a licensed clinical therapist, I often see that people are unaware they are living in survival mode until they seek help for related issues. Several mental health conditions are often linked to survival mode. These include:

• Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): GAD is characterized by excessive, uncontrollable worry about various aspects of life. This ongoing anxiety can keep a person in a state of readiness for potential threats (Anxiety and Depression Association of America, n.d.).
• Complex PTSD (C-PTSD): Unlike PTSD, which can result from a single traumatic event, C-PTSD arises from prolonged exposure to trauma, such as childhood abuse. This condition can lead to severe emotional dysregulation and a persistent sense of danger (Herman, 1997).
• Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): BPD is marked by intense emotional instability, fear of abandonment, and difficulty in maintaining relationships. Individuals with BPD often have a history of trauma and may remain in survival mode as a way to cope with emotional pain (National Institute of Mental Health, n.d.).
• Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): PTSD is a condition that can develop after exposure to a traumatic event. Individuals with PTSD often experience flashbacks, nightmares, and severe anxiety, keeping them in a constant state of alertness (Mayo Clinic, 2018).

The Long-Term Effect of Survival Mode Mindset

Breaking Free from Survival -Mindset

After reading this, you may free hopeless or even shocked, but I am here to tell you there is hope! You have the power to change the narrative. Here are a few ways you can change your mindset from surviving to thriving:

1. Awareness and Recognition: Understanding that you are in survival mode is the first step. Recognize the patterns and behaviors that keep you in this state (Mind, 2019).
2. Therapy: Working with a therapist, especially one trained in trauma-informed care, can help you process past trauma and develop healthier coping mechanisms (National Alliance on Mental Illness, 2020).
3. Self-Care and Mindfulness: Engaging in regular self-care practices and mindfulness can help reduce anxiety and promote a sense of safety (Kabat-Zinn, 1990).
4. Building Support Systems: Creating a network of supportive relationships can provide the stability and security needed to move out of survival mode (University of California, Berkeley, n.d.).
5. Self-Help Books: Self-help books would be a great resource when learning to “thrive and not survive.” In my book, Today, I Love Me: A Self-Help Guide to Living Unapologetically by Letting Go of What No Longer Serves You. This self-help guide serves as your compass, guiding you on a transformative journey of self-discovery and empowerment helping your release old mindsets, people, places and things that no longer serve you purpose in your life.

Survival mode is a deeply ingrained response to chronic stress and trauma, often learned in childhood. While it serves as a crucial coping mechanism during times of danger, remaining in survival mode can significantly impact mental health and overall well-being. Understanding and addressing the underlying causes of survival mode, through therapy and self-care, can lead to healing and a more fulfilling life.

Until next time, stay well and take care…

Zelina Chinwoh, MSW, LCSW

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